"Whoso curseth his father or his mother, his lamp shall be put out in obscure darkness."
Proverbs 20:20
Not only does obscure darkness sound pretty bad, but there is also a specific commandment for this, telling us to honor our parents. ... I think this one gets ignored a lot because, as children, we know firsthand at least what we think of as our parents' injustice or hypocrisy. Unlike God, our earthly parents are fallible and do not always have our best interests in mind. But God asks us not to curse then, but rather to love and honor them.
I don't think that God means for any of us to stay in an abusive situation. If that is the case, then God wants us to get to safety first, and worry about forgiveness later. In most normal situations though, our pride as children (of whatever age) often gets in the way of seeing our parents clearly. We don't actually know more than they do... it just feels like it. :) Sometimes it is difficult to learn compassion in such close quarters, and family relationships can be sensitive, but just as God asks us to love everyone, even our enemies, God also asks us to love our parents, and honor them for the sacrifices that they have made in our behalf.
Today, let's remember not to compare our parents' weaknesses to our strengths, but to have compassion for them as we have compassion towards ourselves and our own weaknesses and hypocrisy. If we are having trouble forgiving them (or anyone), let's look to God, who can change our hearts and help us to feel love for all people, if we are open to learning it. Let's work on avoiding obscure darkness and find a way to peace, in our families and with all others as we learn to draw closer to God and love as he loves.
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